Transformation

I have been through quite a difficult time in the last year where I have been conscious of my failings (e.g. short-temper, inconsistency etc) & have despaired of ever overcoming them. I felt I was in a bit of a cycle where I would feel close to God & things would get better for a while, then I would lose the plot again & go downhill. Due to my temprament, I would get quite depressed about this & I came to a point in February where I felt I would be short-tempered, picky & inconsistent for the rest of my life.
Now I know the Bible says otherwise & we should just accept that this is absolute truth & anything else is a lie, but I just didn't have the energy to accept that in the face of my experience to the contrary.
So what happened? Did God strike me down for my unbelief? Absolutely not!
What has been happening since then has been God's gentle hand pointing out the baby steps I have made in terms of growing more like Jesus. He has helped me celebrate the little victories when I managed to hold my tongue for half an hour, or bitten back the negative retort & managed something vaguely positive instead. I know there is a long way to go, but I have become convinced by experience (God speaking to my heart), rather than by doctrine (God speaking to my mind) that He is changing me.
In fact, although the theologians may correct me, I have become aware that Rom 12v2 says "be transformed" not "transform yourself" I think this is something that God does, not something He expects us to keep trying to do for ourselves (impossible)
Then on Saturday, I heard a song which totally sums it up & confirmed what God has been saying to me. It is written by my friend Ilse Clark & I heard her sing it at the launch of her album (which is totally sublime by the way). Part of the words say: "You never give up on me / This work in progress / You will complete" At last God has brought me to a point where I can say this is true for me.
So if you hear me sounding off, or getting totally frustrated & depressed with life, please cut me some slack - I'm still under construction, but at least the workmen haven't disappeared for a permanent tea-break!